alt.sex.movies FAQ v5.65 Part 2 of 12 Netiquette for Newbies =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Sections marked with [updated] were updated since the last revision Sections marked with [new] were added since the last revision This FAQ is Copyright 1994-6 by Jeff Knapp, and is made available as a service to the Internet community. It may not be sold in any medium, including electronic, CD-ROM, or database, packaged with any commercial product, or published in print, without the explicit, written permission of Jeff Knapp. Send comments to director@gti.net =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TABLE OF CONTENTS 13 Welcome to Part 2 14 Welcome to USENET!! 14.1 What is USENET? 14.2 What is netiquette? 14.3 How to join a Usenet group 14.4 Fear and Loathing @ AOL.COM 14.5 What's a newbie? Is that bad? 15 What else is there to know? 15.1 What do I call my post? 15.2 What should my posts look like? 15.3 Who do I respond to? 15.4 Where do I put my John Hancock? 15.5 Mind my manners? Eat me! 16 Inappropriate Postings 16.1 Spam 17 Troubleshooting 17.1 Welcome to alt.test 17.2 Meet your Systems Administrator 17.2.1 But I'm not at a college or large business! 18 I don't have Web Access, what can I do to access some of the Web based services on the net? [updated] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= 13 Welcome to Part 2 Welcome to the "newbie" part of our show, where we'll be examining some of the more frequently asked questions of USENET. There are things contained herein which will help you become a solid net.citizen. Non- compliance is known to create prickly bouts of crabbiness in some of the older members of asm (and USENET in general), so thank you, thank you, thank you for looking here first! Most importantly, however, have fun! ================================================================= 14 Welcome to USENET!! 14.1 What is USENET? USENET is a distributed bulletin board system that is not limited in scope to the network of networks we call the Internet. Many Online services, BBSs and other computing sites have newsfeeds without the benefits of FTP, Telnet, or other functions associated with the Internet. With over 13,000 newsgroups, USENET may be the largest body of collective reasoning in the world. Almost every question gets an answer, though some of the most frequently asked questions are contained in this document, so you don't have to bother the old timers with questions they have probably heard a thousand times... For an excellent (and decidedly non-technical) primer on newsgroups, and the 'Net itself, check out "The Internet for Dummies" by John R. Levine and Carol Baroudi (Available from IDG Books). It's a lot of fun, pretty informative, and I don't get a nickel for saying so. 14.2 What is netiquette? USENET is an anarchic society of people talking about things that interest them. In most societies, the best communication is achieved by speaking and acting in a civil and polite manner. This is not always the case in USENET. However, things run more smoothly when people are civil and "play by the rules." There is a counterproductive argument which reasons "This is cyberspace... there are no rules, so fuck you for trying to foist these upon me." This argument does nothing except piss people off. I am of the belief that netiquette exists because people before us have discovered what works well, and after all, if it ain't broke... But people will always do what they want when they have no fear... we only hope they do what's "right." 14.3 How to join a Usenet group It's simple. Just start reading. Read for a couple weeks. This is called "lurking." Feel the place out. Find out what people talk about, see who's who. Every USENET group has experts... take the time to figure out who these people are. Find a FAQ for the group and read it. Maybe the question you need answered has been answered before. After all this time, you'll make your first post, and you'll be nervous, and if you're lucky someone will answer it. Then you'll make a second, then a third... then you'll know an answer to someone else's question and *presto!* you're a productive member of a USENET group. 14.4 Fear and Loathing @ AOL.COM America OnLine does not seem to hold a special place in anyone's (except maybe Steve Case and its subscribers') heart. Since the PC explosion, people who have no prior computer experience have been flocking to this magical place called "Internet." However, some shrewd entrepreneurs realized that the 'Net operates on a strange language called UNIX... and novices (read paying customers) are intimidated and go away. This difficultly has long kept the Internet a haven for techno- savvy college students and researchers. A hip club where computer knowledge was a prerequisite for getting in the door. However, a pretty face is being slapped on the Internet, and now all the dreaded "visitors from New Jersey" are arriving by the busload via some place called "America OnLine" The problems began when people who had no prior computer experience started treading all over "hallowed ground" -- speaking loudly and being obnoxious. As it happened, many AOLers -- drunk with the notion of "surfing the net" -- haven't taken the time to read this document (or others like it) or pay attention to the "Tips of the Day" that the AOL staff posts before you can enter the newsgroup area. (If you're from AOL, pat yourself on the back for checking this out...) With a quick click of the OK button, many AOLers just join the fray and make fools of themselves.. almost begging net.denizens to hate them. Now, you may not be this way, but your predecessors were, so AOL (along with many other on-line services) has gotten a pretty bad name. A reader adds this figure: Look at it this way: 1,000,000 AOL users. 25% of them read news.announce or a faq or something, That leaves 75% of them clueless. Say half of them each post two stoopid "Hey d00dz, I needz the kewl warezzzzz" messages. That's 750,000 lame messages. Hey, that's enough to piss anybody off. :-) His advice: Realize that the USENET has it's own ethos, culture and consciousness that was around long before AOL came on line. AOL, or any other .com service, doesn't OWN the net, rather they are accessing it like anyone else. Don't complain "I pay for this, therefore I don't want to see this" - it's an anarchy, and the fact that you have to pay per hour for access doesn't mean shit. 14.5 What's a newbie? Is that bad? A newbie is a person who is new to the 'Net. It is not bad in and of itself, I mean, you have to be new before you can be old, right? However, there are some things you can do to make being new not so bad. While some people use the term as a epithet, most people use it to describe someone new. For instance, take the time to lurk around a group (read things for a week or so, but don't post to get the feel for what is going on). Catch the scene, then post. It's kinda like being a freshman again. In a few years you'll rule the school, but at first, you'll feel pimply and awkward. Fortunately, things happen much faster here. You'll be an old-timer in a matter of months. You'll probably see reference to this document, and you'd get it and read all about us, and feel good knowing what you're in for. If you don't see a reference to this document, then this sentence is quite rather a paradox, isn't it? ================================================================= 15 What else is there to know? A few things will help you on your way down the alt.sex.movies highway. Here are some pointers gleaned from David Harris, author of the (most excellent) freeware e-mail system, Pegasus Mail (available for anonymous FTP from risc.ua.edu in the directory /pub/network/pegasus), who has absolutely nothing to do with this group, but has allowed me to use this material of his. He retains his copyright, and I make no claims on it at all. It's his. All his. Except the funny parts. They're mine. (I'll mark them with a :- ) so you remember to laugh) 15.1 What do I call my post? Every message needs a subject. Nothing is more frustrating than seeing messages in your newsreader as having "No subject" as a subject. So, title your messages, and make them mean something! * ALWAYS include a subject line in your message. Almost all newsreaders present you with the subject line when you browse the group, and it's often the only clue the recipient has about the contents when filing and searching for messages. * Make the subject line meaningful. For example, sending a message with the subject WHO'S THIS or DIRTY MOVIES is practically as unhelpful as having no subject at all. * If you are replying to a message but are changing the subject of the conversation, change the subject too - or better still, start a new message altogether. The subject is usually the easiest way to follow the thread of a conversation, so changing the conversation without changing the subject can be confusing and can make filing difficult. 15.2 What should my posts look like? * YOUR POSTS SHOULD NOT LOOK LIKE THIS. THIS IS NOT THE WAY A POST SHOULD LOOK. IF YOU MAKE A POST THAT LOOKS LIKE THIS, YOU WILL PROBABLY GET FLAMED. CAPS LOCK is the USENET equivalent of shouting. People don't like people who shout all the time in real-life, and the same holds true here. Don't type your message in all UPPERCASE -- it's extremely difficult to read (although a short stretch of uppercase may serve to emphasize a point heavily). Try to break your message into logical paragraphs and restrict your sentences to sensible lengths. * Use correct grammar and spelling. Electronic mail is all about communication - poorly worded and misspelt messages are hard to read and potentially confusing. Just because electronic mail is fast does not mean that it should be slipshod, yet the worst language-mashing I have ever seen has been done in e-mail messages. If your words are important enough to write, then they're also important enough to write properly. * Avoid public "flames" - messages sent in anger. Messages sent in the heat of the moment generally only exacerbate the situation and are usually regretted later. Settle down and think about it for a while before starting a flame war. (Try going and making yourself a cup of coffee - it's amazing how much you can cool down even in that short a time, besides which a cup of good coffee is a great soother). If you need to vent some frustration, do it in e-mail. No one wants to read about your petty arguments. If you must argue in public, do it in the newsgroup designed for arguments: alt.flame 15.3 Who do I respond to? Communication is pretty dull if only one person does all the talking. So, we interact with each other. And, like all forms of social communications, there are some rules regarding replies. * Try to match your message length to the tenor of the conversation: if you are only making a quick query, then keep it short and to the point. * Include only the MINIMUM you need from the original message. One of the most annoying things you can encounter in e-mail is to have your original 5-page message quoted back at you in its entirety, with the words "Me too" added at the bottom. Quote back only the smallest amount you need to make your context clear. You will be hated and flamed if you do not follow this simple rule. * Use some kind of visual indication to distinguish between text quoted from the original message and your new text - this makes the reply much easier to follow. ">" is a traditional marker for quoted text, but you can use anything provided its purpose is clear and you use it consistently. * Don't reply to flames. Occasionally people will try to provoke some response by posting something like PORNO SUCKS or YOU ALL ARE GOING TO HELL. Smile and let it pass. These people crave a reaction. When they don't get one, it is amazing how fast they disappear. There is also something that has appeared recently called a "troll." A troll is a post designed to elicit mega-messages and cripple a group. The troll message is generally an innocent message plagued with inaccuracies. "Sophia Loren was in Sophie's Choice" would be a good troll. The people would point our, no she wasn't Meryl Streep was. Then the trollers would shoot back that Meryl Streep wasn't in Sophie's Choice, she was in Star Wars... and the group gets tied in knots trying to straighten out a thread that has become so twisted, it is best left to die. 15.4 Where do I put my John Hancock? Always use a signature if you can: make sure it identifies who you are and includes alternative means of contacting you (name and e- mail are usual). In many systems, particularly where mail passes through gateways, your signature may be the only means by which the recipient can even tell who you are. Keep your signature short - four to seven lines is a handy rule of thumb for maximum signature length. Unnecessarily long signatures waste bandwidth (especially when distributed to lists) and can be annoying. Some gateways trim .sigs down to three lines, so don't be surprised if you're forty line message gets chopped by the time it gets to Phoenix... or if your newsreader refuses to post your message because your .sig is too long Some mailers (and newsreaders) allow you to add random strings to your signature: this is well and good and can add character if done carefully. You should consider the following basic rules though: * Keep it short. The length of your quote adds to the length of your signature. A 5,000 word excerpt from Kant's "Critique of Pure Reason" used as a signature will not win you many friends. * Definitions of "offensive" vary widely: avoid quotes which might offend people on the grounds of religion, race, politics or sexuality. * Try to avoid topical or local quotes, since they may be meaningless to recipients in other towns, countries or cultures. * Variable signatures are usually best if they're amusing; polemical outbursts on politics or other such topics will turn most people off, but a one-liner that brings a smile can make someone's day 15.5 Mind my manners? Eat me! We were taught to be nice to people when we were young, and we all too often forget when we are old. Here are some reminders from Emily Post -- OK, OK, its David Harris again... * If you're asking for something, don't forget to say "Please." Similarly, if someone does something for you, it never hurts to say "Thank You." While this might sound trivial, or even insulting, it's astonishing how many people who are perfectly polite in everyday life seem to forget their manners on the 'Net. * Don't expect an immediate answer. Just because you don't get an answer from someone in ten minutes does not mean that he or she is ignoring you, and is no cause for offense. Electronic mail is all about dealing with your communications when you are able to do so. Plus, it may take a day or two for your message to be heard around the world. * Always remember that there is no such thing as a secure mail system. It is unwise to send very personal or sensitive information by e-mail unless you encrypt it using a reliable encryptor. Remember the recipient - you are not the only person who could be embarrassed if a delicate message falls into the wrong hands. Bullet points courtesy of David Harris. All rights reserved. ================================================================= 16 Inappropriate Postings Since there are so many groups in the USENET hierarchy, some readers get upset when topics irrelevant to the subject at hand are posted to the group. Sometimes these messages are intentionally placed in the newsgroup to generate a flame war. other times they are posted as a means of drumming up business for a commercial venture... if they don't have to do with sex movies, they are inappropriate. There is a group devoted to the buying and selling of adult novelties (movies, etc.) called alt.sex.erotica.marketplace. You should go there if you are looking for movies to buy (or check out the section of the FAQ that deals with mail order and other purchase options for more pointers...) 16.1 Spam Any message posted to more than 20 groups is spam. Most spams are off- topic commercials. Please ignore spam or send e-mail to the poster and/or to the system administrator from which the spam was posted but do not post a public reply. If you cannot resist the urge to post a public reply, which will annoy as many readers as did the original post, please at least remove phone numbers and addresses so you don't give more publicity to the original post to which you are objecting. Many spams will be cancelled but your reply with quoted material will not be, insuring that the offensive ad remains longer than it otherwise would have. Though spam takes more system resources (diskspace) and is hated by system administrators for that reason, velveeta or inappropriate crossposting is more disruptive to newsgroups. Particularly, the posting of provocative messages to diverse or antagonistic newsgroups (e.g. alt.cat.lovers and alt.animal.haters) tends to provoke flame wars and argumentative threads that seem to go on forever. Try to ignore velveeta and inappropriate crossposts. If you respond to a crossposted message, pay attention to the groups in which it is posted and remove those in which you do not wish your reply to appear. If you don't you may find yourself flamed from a group you never heard of before. Thanks to George Shaffer for this section. ================================================================= 17 Troubleshooting 17.1 Welcome to alt.test Something's wrong. But what? Could it be your newsfeed is down? Or maybe you're doing something wrong. So, you post message to alt.sex.movies saying TEST - PLEASE IGNORE. And you get flamed. Why? alt.test is a newsgroup dedicated to test messages. As alt.sex.movies is dedicated to discussing porn flicks, and alt.flame is dedicated to flame wars -- alt.test is dedicated to making sure your mailer works. People don't want to see your test postings in their newsgroups, and this goes for any newsgroup, not just asm. So post to alt.test. And use a wacky re: line, or you'll never find your post. 17.2 Meet your Systems Administrator If you are connected to the net through a college or other large organization, you probably have more than one of these people running around. They are system administrators, and they take care of your network, and know how everything works. Seek them out. Make friends. Bring them cookies or Fritos, and they will help you out. You don't have to be embarrassed asking for help, and you don't have to say you're looking for info on porn stars. Tell them you're trying to post to rec.music.beatles, and they'll think you're just a music fan, instead of thinking you're some sort of deranged deviant who keeps a raincoat close at hand (not accurate, but it's what they'll think...) So, make friends with your SysAdmin and watch your net troubles go down the drain! And remember to say "Thank You" and "Please" a lot. And don't forget the cookies. 17.2.1 But I'm not at a college or large business! Then you probably are accessing the net though a BBS, local provider or large online service. These people have tech support help at your disposal. America OnLine, Compuserve, Prodigy and Delphi have special forums for people who are having problems, as well as having people at one end of the phone to give you a hand as you need it. Use these resources. BBSs are a potluck arrangement, so I can't comment on how their support is handled. 18 I don't have Web Access, what can I do to access some of the Web based services on the net? [updated] You're in luck! Almost every feature available to Internet users is also available to a user who only has e-mail access. The Web is no different. Pick up a copy of the following document: "INTERNET BY-EMAIL" Summary: This guide will show you how to retrieve files from FTP sites, explore the Internet via Gopher, search for information with Archie, Veronica, or WAIS, tap into the World-Wide Web, and even access Usenet newsgroups using E-MAIL AS YOUR ONLY TOOL. Finding the Latest Version -------------------------- This document is now available from several automated mail servers. To get the latest edition, send e-mail to one of the addresses below. To: listserv@ubvm.cc.buffalo.edu (for US/Canada/etc.) Leave Subject blank, and enter only this line in the body of the note: GET INTERNET BY-EMAIL NETTRAIN F=MAIL To: mail-server@rtfm.mit.edu (for Eastern US) Leave Subject blank, and enter only this line in the body of the note: send usenet/news.answers/internet-services/access-via-email To: mailbase@mailbase.ac.uk (for UK/Europe/etc.) Leave Subject blank, and enter only this line in the body of the note: send lis-iis e-access-inet.txt You can also get the file by anonymous FTP at one of these sites: Site: ubvm.cc.buffalo.edu get NETTRAIN/INTERNET.BY-EMAIL Site: rtfm.mit.edu get pub/usenet/news.answers/internet-services/access-via-email Site: mailbase.ac.uk get pub/lists/lis-iis/files/e-access-inet.txt *** END PART 2 ***