Life Blood


It's 3am, and a man is driving his brand new BMW M3 SMGII down the N1 
at 240km/h. He's two minutes away from home when he sees a car on the 
side of the road - on its roof, and flames all around.

There's no one else in the area and his cellphone reception is dead, so 
he stops his car. Sure enough, there's a beautiful woman in the car, but 
she's bleeding to death. The guy reckons "screw it" and rushes home to 
fetch a blanket. He gets back, puts the blanket on the back seat of his 
M3, and puts the woman on the blanket. He then rushes her to hospital.

Six months she lies in the hospital, and he is with her every day and 
every night. He donates blood to keep her alive. Eventually, she recovers 
fully, and they get married.

Life is cool for a few years, until one day she gets fed up and decides
to leave him. His love of money is obvious, and she feels like a trophy 

As she comes down the stairs, struggling with her two suitcases, she 
reaches into her pocket for the keys to the Jaguar. Sure enough, he 
stops her before she reaches the door and asks, "What are you doing?"

"I'm leaving you," she says.

"Oh really, and how are you going to leave? The keys in your hand are
for the Jaguar I paid for. It's my car. You're not taking it anywhere."

"Fine," she says, and throws the keys at him.

"And those bulging suitcases? The clothes you're wearing?

Everything, I've paid for. They are my suitcases and my clothes. 
You're not taking them anywhere."

"Fine," she says, and throws the suitcases at him. She strips down
completely and throws her clothes at him too.

"And the blood in your body? I sat with you for six months in the 
hospital. You know half of the blood is mine. You're not going anywhere."

She pulls out her tampon and says "Fine! I'll pay you back in monthly


[Contributed by Peter]