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Finally! A translation of the terms the HR department likes to 
use on us poor mortals...


WHAT THEY SAY			What it really means!

OUTGOING PERSONALITY		Always going out of the office
GREAT PRESENTATION SKILLS	Able to bullshit
GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS	Spends lots of time on the phone
AVERAGE EMPLOYEE		Not too bright
EXCEPTIONALLY WELL QUALIFIED	Made no major blunders yet
WORK IS FIRST PRIORITY		Too ugly to get a date
ACTIVE SOCIALLY			Drinks a lot
FAMILY IS ACTIVE SOCIALLY	Spouse drinks, too
INDEPENDENT WORKER		Nobody knows what he/she does
QUICK THINKING			Offers plausible excuses
CAREFUL THINKER			Won't make a decision
AGGRESSIVE			Obnoxious
USES LOGIC ON DIFFICULT JOBS	Gets someone else to do it
EXPRESSES HIMSELF WELL		Speaks English
HAS LEADERSHIP QUALITIES	Is tall or has a loud voice
EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD JUDGEMENT	Lucky
KEEN SENSE OF HUMOUR		Knows a lot of dirty jokes
CAREER MINDED			Back Stabber
LOYAL				Can't get a job anywhere else


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[Contributed by Susanna]