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WHITE WOMEN:

1st date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
2nd date: You get to grope all over and make out.
3rd date: You get to have sex - but only in the missionary position.


IRISH WOMEN:

1st date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
2nd date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.


ITALIAN WOMEN:

1st date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
2nd date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti and 
          meatballs.
3rd date: You have sex, she wants to marry you and insists on a 
          3-carat ring.
5th anniversary: You already have five kids together and hate the 
          thought of having sex.
6th anniversary: You find yourself a girlfriend.


JEWISH WOMEN:

1st date: You get dynamite head.
2nd date: You get more great head.
3rd date: You tell her you'll marry her and never get head again.


POLISH WOMEN:

1st date: You pick her up, she isn't home. 
          She gave you the wrong address.
2nd date: You decide to meet at a restaurant. She gets lost
          getting to the restaurant and then again going home.
3rd date: She's pregnant. She's not sure if its hers.


CHINESE WOMEN:

1st date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
2nd date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner, nothing happens.
3rd date: You don't even get to the third date and you already
          realised nothing is going to happen.


INDIAN WOMEN:

1st date: Meet her parents.
2nd date: Set the date of the wedding.
3rd date: Wedding night.


BLACK WOMEN:

1st date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
2nd date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.
3rd date: You get to pay her rent.
10th date: She's pregnant by someone other than you.


LATINO WOMEN:

1st date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Riunite, and 
          have sex in the back of her car.
2nd date: She's pregnant.
3rd date: Move in with her, her two cousins, her sister's boyfriend and 
          live happily ever after eating rice and beans in the Bronx.


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[Contributed by Bob]