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Hmmmm... What am I - flypaper for freaks?


It's truly amazing what fabulous and promising business proposals (all from
the extremely prosperous African continent) have come my way recently...

Hey, let's all get together and enter into these (curly-) hair-brained schemes!
(the so called "Nigerian Scam")

Exhibits A through F:





ATTN: THE MANAGING DIRECTOR,

DEAR SIR,

I AM MISS JENNETH SHAIHILI KABILA FROM DEMOCRATIC
REPUBLIC OF CONGO. A DAUGTHER OF LATE PRESIDENT
LAURENT KABILA OF BLESSED MEMORY.

MY FATHER, WHILE AT THE POINT OF DEATH, CONFIDED IN ME
AND REVEALED TO ME THAT HE DEPOSITED TWO SEALED TRUNK
BOXES CONTAINING $18MILLION U.S
DOLLARS WITH A SECURITY COMPANY HERE IN AFRICA. HE
DISCLOSED THIS TO ME
CONFIDENTIALLY.

HOWEVER, SINCE THE BREAD WINNER IS NO LONGER ALIVE, MY
POSITION DOES NOT WARRANT ME TO EXPOSE MY PRIVACY
BECAUSE OF MY TWIN BROTHER'S INVOLVEMENT IN THE
GOVERNMENT AS THE PRESIDENT OF THE ENTIRE NATION. AND
WE NO LONGER DO THINGS IN COMMON.

I WISH TO USE THIS AMPLE OPPORTUNITY TO SEEK FOR YOUR
KIND ASSISTANCE OF TTRANSFERRING AND INVESTING THIS
FUND IN YOUR COUNTRY. ESPECIALLY, IN REAL ESTATE AND
STOCK MARKET.

RIGHT NOW, I HAVE MAPPED OUT 20% OF THE TOTAL
INVESTMENT FUND AS YOUR COMMISSION. WHILE 5% WILL BE
USE FOR ANY MISCELLENOUS EXPENSES.

THANKS A LOT IN ANTICIPATION OF YOUR QUICK RESPONSE.

SINCERELY YOURS,

JENNETH SHAIHILI KABILA.





URGENT AND CONFIDENTIAL
  BUSINESS PROPOSAL

Attn:Herby Hönigsperger
[Oh - they actually know me?! - Ed.]

Sir,

I am the Chief  Accountant and the Chairman of the
Tender Board Committee of the Nigeria National
Petroleum Corporation (NNPC). After due consultations
with other two members of the committee, I was given
the mandate to arrange and negotiate with a trusted
foreign firm or individual who can provide an Account
for us to pay in the sum of US$48 million resulting
from deliberately over -invoiced contract payments for
contracts executed by foreign companies for the
ministry. Currently  these contractors are being paid
and we want to use this opportunity to transfer this
inflated amount in to a foreign Account  inform of
contract payment. We have put in place all necessary
machinaries to ensure that the money is remitted into
the Account within 10 working days.

All we require from you are the name and number of
your company?s or private or any other Account you may
want to give us. Also your private telephone,
cellphone, and  fax number.

For providing us with this assistance, we have agreed
to offer you 30 % of the total sum while 60% will be
for us, the remaining  10% will be used to settle any
contigencies.

Contact me immediately you receive this mail if you
are interest in our proposal through my e-mail address
alahajiisa@yahoo.com

Best regards,

ALHAJI ISA





>
>ALHAJI BUKOLA SARAKI
>
>Tel: 871-762535915
>FaX.: 871-762535916
>Lagos,  Nigeria.
>
>ATTN.: THE MANAGING DIRECTOR / CEO.
>
>Alternative e-mail   address: alhaji_oyefuga_onyia@presidency.com
>
>Dear Sir/Madam
>
>REQUEST FOR URGENT (CONFIDENTIAL BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP OF THE TRANSFER OF
>US$46,560,000.00 (FORTY SIX MILLION, FIVE HUNDRED AND SIXTY THOUSAND
>UNITED STATES DOLLARS ONLY).
>
>I hope this letter will not embarrass you since we have not had any
>previous communication.  I got your reference from the Nigeria Exports
>Promotion Council (NEPC) and went further to have it confirmed by your
>country?s trade department under private inquiry that is not related to my
>aim of writing you this letter.
>
>I, on behalf of my other colleagues from different Federal Government of
>Nigeria owned parastatals decided to solicit your assistance as regards
>the transfer of the above stated amount into your bank account.  This fund
>arose from the over-invoicing of various contracts awarded in my
>parastatals to certain foreign contractors some time ago.
>
>We as holders of official positions in various parastatals, were mandated
>by this new civilian government to scrutinize all payments made to certain
>foreign contractors by the past military government and we discovered that
>some of the contracts they executed were grossly over-invoiced, either by
>omission or commission.  Also we discovered that the sum of $66,560,000.00
>(Sixty-Six Million, Five Hundred and Sixty Thousand United States Dollars
>Only) was lying in a suspense account, although the foreign contractors
>were fully paid their entitlements after executing the
 said contracts.
>
>We all agreed that the over-invoiced amount be transferred (for our own
>use) into a bank account provided by a foreign partner, as the code of
>conduct of the Federal Civil Service does not allow us to operate foreign
>accounts.
>
>However, we have succeeded in transferring some of these money, precisely
>US$20,000,000.00 (Twenty Million United States Dollars Only) into a
>foreign account in GENEVA (SWITZERLAND) last week.  But unfortunately, the
>provider of the account has severed all forms of contacts with us as he
>has refused to adhere to our earlier mutual agreement insisting that the
>total amount be paid into his nominated bank account before disbursement
>will take effect.  If for US$20M (Twenty Million United States Dollars
>Only) we are not compensated, how can one guarantee full compensation on
>remittance of the balance of US$46.560M (Forty-Six Million, 
Five Hundred
>and Sixty Thousand United States Dollars Only). [Is that all? -Ed.]
>
>We are therefore seeking your assistance based on the balance amount of
>US$46.560M, which can be speedily processed and fully remitted into your
>nominated bank account.  On successful remittance of the fund into your
>account, you will be compensated with 25% of the amount for assistance and
>services and 5% set aside for expenses contingency.
>
>This transaction is closely knitted and in view of our SENSITIVE POSITION
>we cannot afford a slip, I assure you that this transaction is 100% risk
>free.  We will avail you with our identities as regards our respective
>offices, when relationship is fully established and smooth operation
>commences.
>
>I am at your disposition to entertain any question(s) from you in respect
>of this transaction, so contact me immediately through the above telephone

>and fax numbers for further information on the requirements and procedure.
>
>Please note that the DEAL needs utmost confidentiality and your immediate
>response will be highly appreciated and we will use our own share of the
>money to establish a lucrative firm in your country.
>
>Yours Truly,
>
>ALHAJI BUKOLA SARAKI





>From: MrKumo Salim
>American Efax: 1 775 254 8031
>kumosalim1@worldemail.com
>
>Dear Sir,
>
>PROPOSAL
>
>May I first of all honestly express the seriousness and dutifulness with 
>which I am sharing this correspondence with you. I implore you to hold it 
>and all subsequent correspondences regarding this proposition in strictest 
>confidentiality..
>
>Be allayed of any fears stemming from the genuineness of the transaction. I 
>know that as we progress, any existing doubt(s) will be put to rest. 
>Fortunately, I am in a position to ensure and will actually see to it that 
>the transaction is completed smoothly and swiftly.
>
>For your information, I am Mr. Kumo Salim, a top Nigerian civil servant 
>with the Federal Ministry of Aviation (FMA) and a member of the 5-membe
r 
>adhoc committee set up by the Federal Government of Nigeria to review 
>contracts awarded by the previous military administration between 
>1995-1999. We, the members of the committee are interested in the 
>importation of goods into the country with funds presently floating in the 
>Federal Ministry of Finance (FMF) foreign payments account.
>
>Our request is anchored on our desire and need to establish a profiting 
>business relationship with you and your company. We therefore solicit your 
>partnership to enable us transfer into your designated account the said 
>funds.
>
>The funds in question, presently floating in the Federal Ministry of 
>Aviation (FMA) foreign payments account with the Federal Ministry of 
>Finance (FMF) is as a result of grossly over-invoiced contracts that were 
>executed for the FMA during the previous military administration in Nigeria 
>and are pre
sently under verification. To this effect, the present 
>administration in Nigeria set up our adhoc committee to identify, 
>scrutinize and recommend for payment all valid contracts that have been 
>fully executed. In the course of our assignment, we have identified a lot 
>of misappropriated and inflated contract sums, which are presently floating 
>in the suspense account of the Federal Ministry of Finance (FMF), ready for 
>payment. The companies that executed these contracts have been duly paid. 
>It is part of the over-inflated sum, totalling US$28,250,000.00 (twenty 
>eight million, two hundred and fifty thousand United States dollars) that 
>we intend to transfer into a foreign account.
>
>The members of the committee have therefore mandated me, as a matter of 
>trust, to seek a foreign partner into whose account we would transfer the 
>sum of US$28,250,000.00 (twenty eight million, two hundr
ed and fifty 
>thousand United States dollars). This is the main purpose of this 
>correspondence.
>
>On completion of the transfer, we the committee members have agreed to 
>share the fund thus:
>
>(1) 10% to be used in settling taxation and all local and foreign expenses 
>that will be incurred in the course of this transaction;
>(2) 25% for the account owner (you) and
>(3) 65% for us (the committee members)
>
>It is from the 65% that we intend to commence the importation of goods into 
>the Nigerian market. Please note that this transaction is completely safe 
>and guaranteed since the law under which our committee was set up has 
>empowered us to disburse all the funds found to be floating in the Federal 
>Ministry of Finance (FMF) redundant accounts from 1995 till date. Also, the 
>present democratic dispensation creates even a more favourable atmosphere.
>We shall
 immediately commence with all appropriate arrangements to transfer 
>of the funds as soon as you send us the following information;
>
>(1) Your company's name and full address (if you own one)
>
>(2) Your complete banking information.This should include,Your banker's 
>name, address, telephone and fax numbers (if you want to use your old 
>account however you can open a new account for this transaction)and your 
>account number.
>
>(3) Name of would be beneficiary
>
>The above information is to enable us put up Letters of Claim and Job 
>Description to the appropriate ministries for the issuance of the mandatory 
>fund release approval/recommendations. This way, you or your company will 
>become recognized and accepted as the beneficiary of the contract 
>entitlements before the final remittance to your nominated account by the 
>Federal Ministry of Finance (FMF)being the pa
ying body.
>
>We look forward to doing business with you and solicit your absolute 
>confidentiality in this transaction. Please acknowledge receipt of this 
>letter using my American Efax number:1-775-254-8031 or  email to 
>:kumosalim1@worldemail.com  for more details regarding this transaction.
>
>
>Yours faithfully,
>
>Mr. Taiwo Bankole
>
>Efax# 1-775-254-8031
>kumosalim1@worldemail.com





From: "JUSTICE TITO" 


Dear,

 I am Justice Tito minister of solid mineral under the government 
of president Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe.

 I am married with one wife and five children.  I have served my 
beloved country Zimbabwe as a minister of solid minerals for more 
than thirteen good years now.

 Sir, your cooperation and advise is of great importance for I would 
like to invest my money in any lucrative or money yielding venture in 
your country of which you will be part of this investment proposal as 
an active partner following your professional advise toward the pursuit.

 I would personally like you to look into, real
estate and property management, purchase of firm or industry.

 Please sir, I need to be educated professionally due to my low
knowledge for any investment out side my coun
try Zimbabwe.  I 
would like this proposal to be treated with absolute trust and honesty.
 Kindly furnish and equip me with details about one.
 I am looking forward hearing from you with good news.

 Thanks for your anticipated cooperation.

 Best Regards.

 Justice  Tito.





Mr Alexander Zuma
Confidential Tel :++ 874-76-253-5870 
Confidential Fax:++ 874-76-253-5871
Office Tel ++27-83-493-92446
Email Add :zuma2@post.com

Dear Sir, 

STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL & URGENT.

I am Alexander Zuma, a native of Cape Town in South Africa and I am an 
Executive Accountant with the South Africa Department of Mining & Natural 
Resources. First and foremost, I apologized using this medium to reach 
you for a transaction/business of this magnitude, but this is due to 
confidentiality and prompt access reposed on this medium. Be informed 
that a member of the South Africa Export Promotion Council (SEPC) who 
was at the Government delegation to your country during a trade exhibition 
gave your enviable credentials/particulars to me.

I have decided to seek a confidential co-operation with you in the execution 
of the deal described hereunder for the benefit of all parties and hope you 
will keep it as a top secret because of the nature of this transaction. 
Within the Department of Mining & Natural Resources where I work as an 
Executive Accountant and with the cooperation of four other top officials, 
we have in our possession as overdue payment bills totaling Eighteen Million, 
Five Hundred Thousand U. S. Dollars (US$18,500,000.00) which we want to 
transfer abroad with the assistance and cooperation of a foreign company/individual 
to receive the said fund on our behalf or a reliable foreign non-company account 
to receive such funds. More so, we are handicapped in the circumstances, as the 
South Africa Civil Service Code of Conduct does not allow us to operate offshore 
account hence your importance in the whole transaction.

This amount (US$18.5m) represents the balance of the total contract value executed 
on behalf of my Department by a foreign contracting firm, which we the officials 
over-invoiced deliberately. Though the actual contract cost have been paid to 
the original contractor, leaving the balance in the tune of the said amount 
which we have in principles gotten approval to remit by Telegraphic Transfer 
(T.T) to any foreign bank account you will provide by filing in an application 
through the Justice Ministry here in South Africa for the transfer of rights and 
privileges of the former contractor to you. I have the authority of my partners 
involved to propose that should you be willing to assist us in the transaction, 
your share of the sum will be 30% of the US$18.5 million, 60% for us and 10% for 
taxation and miscellaneous expenses. The business itself is 100% safe, on your 
part provided you treat it with utmost secrecy and confidentiality. Also your 
area of specialization is not a hindrance to the successful execution. 

I have reposed my confidence in you and hope that you will not disappoint me. 
Endeavor to contact me immediately through my above tel/fax number or my e-mail 
address zuma@mail.com, whether or not you are interested in this deal. 

If you are not, it will enable me contact other another Foreign partner with 
recommendation to carry out this deal. I want to assure you that myself and 
my partners are in a position to make the payment of this claim possible 
provided you can give us a very strong assurance and guarantee that our share 
will be secured and Please remember to treat this matter as very confidential 
matter; because we will not comprehend with any form of exposure as we are still 
in active Government Service and remember once again that time is of the essence 
in this business. 

I wait in anticipation of your fullest co-operation. I am available to 
entertain any questions concerning the clarity of this transaction.

 Yours faithfully,

Alexander  Zuma (Mr)


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